When did the colours of red, blue, yellow and purple become so terrifying to grown-ups, yet so exciting to kids aged one to six?
Throw in an oversized car, some very catchy tunes, dance moves even your mum could do, mix in a dinosaur, pirate and a dog and you have the ultimate Wiggles concert recipe for kiddy craziness and slightly tortured grown-ups.
As much as grown-ups love to hate and hate to love The Wiggles, there is no denying their infectious tunes in any household or any car. There is also no mistaking the insatiable desire for tickets to a Wiggles concert (also known as The Rolling Stones or Adele of the one to six-year-old live concert world). Wiggles concerts and tours sell out in minutes. Sure, they are not selling stadiums but have no fear. They would sell out if they did!
Did you score tickets?
Managing to snag tickets to the Wiggles tour is a skill in itself. Parents proudly gloat over social media with their parents of the year status. Ticketless parents are left saddened. They just wanted to see the delight on their children’s faces, or was it that the mums actually wanted to see the smile on Simons Wiggles face…hmmmmm?
If you are one of the grown-ups “lucky” enough to have snagged tickets you might like to start your concert prep now, so you are match fit for the big Wiggles concert day.
Here is all you need to survive a Wiggles concert.
Wiggles Concert Survival Kit
1) Never release the date
Don’t even mention to the kids that The Wiggles may or may not be anywhere near their hometown. Plead ignorance – that way if you miss out on tickets to the concert experience of a lifetime the guilt of being the worst parent in the world will not be minimal.
If you did have ninja like skills and managed to grab a handful of tickets, here are the rules. Be willing to accept bribes of wine and chocolate from friends who are after your ‘spare’ tickets. It is ok to gloat, however, do not on any occasion tell any children involved that the tickets exists, especially if the concert is months away. The pestering will slowly kill you.
Note: If you wanted to set up a reward chart for chores to be done, naps to be longer, vegetables eaten or beds to be stayed in all night as an incentive to be able to attend The Wiggles concert, this would be viewed as acceptable.
2) Wiggles outfit at the ready.
Not the kid’s costumes – that is a given. It’s your outfit. Skivvies may be a no-no unless you are officially related to The Wiggles. Why not get in the spirit with an Emma bow or colour matched outfit, scarf or accessories. After all, you have paid for a ticket so you may as well make the most of this concert experience. It might be your first live gig for a while!
3) Pre Wiggles concert craft essentials.
If you haven’t heard of bows, bones and roses and their significance at a Wiggles concert, then you have unfortunately failed your Wiggles test.
Seriously though, whip out the craft box, the fabric scraps, cardboard, crayons and glue. The Wiggles genuinely love collecting bows for Emma, roses for Dorothy and bones for Wags. The proof is in The Wiggles Facebook page with their gorgeous pictures of cuties with their offerings to the gods…whoops, to The Wiggles.
4) Preparation is life.
Scouts motto – be prepared. The last thing you need to be doing the morning of a Wiggles concert is dashing around last minute while the kids are bouncing off the walls with excitement.
Still in nappies? Have the nappy bag packed. Snacks ready, water bottles? The queue before the concert might require a few snacks to pass the time. Dummies, blankies, favourite teddies. Bring them all.
If there is going to be no pram parking make sure you dig out the Ergo, Bjorn or baby carrier.
Remember the tickets.
No one wants to be the grown up who forgets the tickets. No-one.
5) Caffeination is essential
The kid’s exuberance for the day ahead may wear you down by 5.30 am and coffee may be your only means of survival. Pace yourself though. You don’t want the caffeine high too early.
6) The biggest decision of the day – front row or who cares?
Depending on your Wiggles venue you may or may not have allocated seating. In the instance where you don’t have allocated seats, the first in best-dressed rule applies. If it is essential that your kids be front row to The Wiggles concert… then may the force be with you. Bring along your ninja skills, unlimited patience and potentially a bottomless pit of snacks as you may need to queue up early.
7) Concert etiquette
A shout out to the grown-ups on this one. A Wiggles concert is for the kids. That means kids get priority. They are supposed to get up and dance – it is not a licence for grown-ups to let their kids go wild. There will be a range of kids ages and grown-ups of all ages occupying the same floor space. Be prepared for trodden on fingers and little bodies to be bumping into you.
8) The non-responsive child.
Be prepared. The child in your life who is obsessed with The Wiggles, you would expecting to dance and sing like no one is watching will most likely be the one who will sit through the entire concert, either on your lap in bewildered silence or pestering you to go home. On the odd occasion, they emerge from their star struck haze to sway a little in time with the final song.
9) The merch meltdown
The Wiggles are not silly skivvy wearers. Guaranteed the merchandise table will be very sparkly, glittery, enticing and exciting and will be perfectly positioned to catch you when you are at your weakest.
Pro tip: Stand your ground on the ‘No’ front and be prepared for Tip 9.
Pro tip: Budget the merchandise funds into your day and drop hints to grandparents for cash donations prior.
Ultimate Pro tip: Head to Kmart before the concert – stealthily stash some Kmart priced Wiggles fun in your handbag and whip it out close to the merchandise table. Win – Win.
10) Post Wiggle depression
Conveniently Wiggles concerts tend to coincide with every single kid’s rest time. Once the reality hits that the Wiggles concert is over, sadness combined with over tiredness and over stimulation will likely result in a flood of tears and unhappy faces. There is no real survival tip for this. It is every grown-up for themselves. Leave any judgement behind as grown-ups around you call on whatever bribery tactics they have to keep the children from meltdown.
11) Wine down
No..no typo. Wine down. The best way to wind down after the thrill of The Wiggles Day. A glass of wine. The ultimate proof of survival.
The Wiggle Around Australia tour soon hits Mingara Recreation Club. What a location to survive the Wiggles concert. Ample parking, loads of space and importantly barista made coffee everywhere you look!
Stay up to date with kids entertainment at Mingara here.